en. fikri.

haha.
u're 20 already.
big guy now. bwahaha.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BOTA!!! <== *try to make the words look cheerful with the colours, but, they look so wrong* =PP
hope, in the future, nothing will never let you down.
u're a great guy and be great forever.

cheers. life.
:)

what if.s

"what if there is no one for me to cling on over there.
what if i get all whooze up and i cannot stand straight on my own.
what if i get scared and start thinking about backing out.
what if i want to love something but i'm too afraid to to that.
what if i my head can't think straight and get all blocked up.
.
.
.
.
.
and many more what ifs."

i wrote them down on a piece of paper.
take out a lighter.
burn it up.

and try to let all the worries go.
and try to let my mind be at peace.

*what if i just be myself?*
haha.
just shut up.
and live on.

risau itu, kadangkala, perlu.

kadangkala aku risau.
risau pada orang yang pandai bersuara tapi tiada isi.
risau pada orang yang banyak berkata tapi fakta daif.
risau pada orang yang hebat berbicara tapi ilmu cetek.
kerana ramai (mungkin) yang pandang pada luaran (kepetahan) bukan dalaman (fakta).

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kata khatib tadi, "ilmu bukan milik persendirian, tapi amanah Allah untuk disampaikan"
*ya, saya tidak tidur masa khutbah tadi*

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kadangkala menarik melihat orang berusaha yang betul-betul tegakkan apa yang dia rasa benar.
walaupun orang lain pandang hina akan usaha dia. (baca: memperlekeh)
perserverance, orang putih kata. cekal hati dan istiqamah, aku kata.

dan aku tanya diri aku, 'kau mampu tak buat macam dia?'
sekarang, aku masih geleng kepala.
keyakinan belum mekar. dan masih mencari.

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"pejal, what is true excitement?"
"when you feel content and your beloved ones are by your side; my definition"

randomZzz.

watched avatar again.
this time on 3D, babeh.
muahaha.

i like.

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packing is fun and tedious in the same time. yes.
i'm glad i'm doing this for something that i have been hoping for since, like, i was budak kecik lagi.

>taking deep breath<
excited; buying all those new stuff.
and happy; my family keeping on telling me what-to-bring and what-to-do things.
just to make sure i'm focusing on what am i doing right now. *guided*

>random words being strung up together to become sentences<

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ada org request aku masak.
mula2 pikir, cam lawak.
tapi, let me try once for you :P.
afterall, kat sana mmg kena masak sendiri gak kan.

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i watched gLee just now on 711.
suprisingly, my eyes were glued to the TV throughout the show.
maybe i love the musical part.
oh yes, it's a TV series.
and yes, it won a golden globes (best musical, if not mistaken).

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saya melakukan beberapa perkara kerana saya suka, kadangkala.
saya juga melakukan beberapa perkara kerana itu kewajipan.
saya berusaha untuk menjalankan kewajipan saya dengan hati yang gembira.
usaha itu penting. tapi tak lengkap tanpa kepercayaan.

Shila?

i know some may wondered yesternight why the MCs talked about Shila before Faizal Tahir performed.
the main reason was because Faizal Tahir has lung infection. he couldn't perform for the semi-final muzik2 comp as his infection was a little bit severe at that time. so, Shila was selected to take up his place. Thanx to her that Faizal can perform yesternight. She managed to sing Bencinta with power, i daresay. let us call it the female version of Bencinta. quite shaky at first, but i had goosebumps all over me as she strucked the high notes. she performed gloriusly~ Faizal should be proud of her. with proper guidance Shila should be one of the A-list malaysia singer. >or she has already been one?< :P

why did Faizal perform yesternight despite his illness?
he didn't want to disappoint his fans. he felt obliged to fulfil his fans expectation. and, yes, he really did his job well.

here's a link to Shila's performance.

AJL 24

watched AJL 24 in amazement...!!!
the best one i've ever watched.
i dunno how next year going to top this year's.

the introduction by siti nurhaliza and lan was very energetic and could already feel how this ajl is going to be; awesome.
MCs [ally, cheryl, faizal]; sesungguhnya berjaya buat aku golek2 atas lantai ketawa [read: rotfl].

overall; all performances were very superb. they were unique in their own way.
as i have posted b4 on my facebook i don't mind if either one of my choices win [faizal tahir, bunkface, aizat]
and the result made me happy.

these are the result.

RM 10000; vokal terbaik: black - aku rindu sayang kamu. [high-pitched voice; wow]
RM 10000; persembahan terbaik: aizat - kau aku. [yang ni aku bajet pejal tahir menang]

RM 12000; tempat ketiga: faizal tahir - bencinta
RM 15000; naib juara: yuna - dan sebenarnya
RM 35000; juara: aizat- pergi

faizal tahir; anda mendapat tempat ketiga walaupun anda tengah sakit. saya kagum dan hormat akan awak. your voice did blown me away walupun tiada 'tarik2'. you totally exceeded my expectation. YOU ROCK!
i wish you a speedy recovery~

yuna; saya suka intro persembahan. bermain ngan melodi macam orkestra. anda bertenaga dalam tenang. aura~

-saya puas hati-

muhaimin; for AJL this year, aku x jerit time pejal menang 3rd. my dad was in front of me. :P

itu dan ini.

currently, i'm listening to music at UN's blog.
seriusly, Un, you really have talent in choosing good songs.
i've already listening to the songs for some days now.

and just now, i came across a lenka's song called 'trouble is a friend'.
watching its music video remind me of teh wahida's drawing.
they are creative, unique and clearly depict the emotion that she wanted to express.
it's like i can feel what the character(s) in the drawing is(are) undergoing at that moment.

friends; you may not keep in touch with them often, but you can still 'feel' their presences through their arts and likings.

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i'm sorry i was/am never a good/excellent/wonderful friend that can be there by you side whenever you need me, that can share jokes of presents/past with you, that can understand your feelings, that can think about the future together with you, or anything else that you expect from me. yeah, use that, not who, as i am not human according to you. i can be a hypochrite. i can be back-stabber. i can be a moron. that is just me.

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on a positive note, Allah has given me the chance to go Down Under.

frankly, i have this mixed feelings inside here *pointing at my chest on the left hand side*. i'm happy, i'm nervous, i'm shocked, i'm excited, etc3. happens everytime whenever i'm going to a new place. :) but this is BIG; very new environment, culture, accent :P , mindset, etc3. in the end, i just have to say to myself, "this is going to be fun".

thank Him for giving me a very supportive family and friends who always be by my side till now. i'm very grateful and this gives me the motivation to strive further. <== baca dgn nada org dapat grammy award.

ok. now is the most perfect time to be serious...

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saya hanya akan berserah selepas berusaha. *pegangan*